Learning to Love #3

This week, Valentin’s Day week, we are talking about love. This is more of a learning to love fully. It started with us learning to love ourselves first before we can love anyone else. Next, we talked about forgiving others and learning to validate ourselves instead of looking for validations from others. If you have not read those blogs, please go back to the blogs posted on Monday and Tuesday. It will help you understand the direction we are going.

Now, I want to talk about a subject many don’t even think about when they think about love. It is so important to enjoy life. Yes, I did say enjoy life. We tend to go through life and feel miserable or just act and feel serious. In our relationship with ourselves and others, if we do not experience the enjoyment of life, we are not able to love the way we need to.

Right now, some of you are probably looking at my life I am made. I can hear you now: “I can’t enjoy life!” “We have problems in our lives!” “Life is horrible!” Is it? Do we really have to walk around with our heads hanging down feeling the pressure of life? We interpret and make decisions to live miserably. On the other hand, we interpret and make decisions to live and enjoy life to the fullest.

I don’t know about you but I want enjoyment and excitement. I want to get up every morning thinking, “Today is a great day!” What kind of life do we have or relationships do we have if we wake up saying, “Wow, another day just like the last. I hate life. I don’t want to get up and face the horrors of the world.”

Yes, I know that all things aren’t rosy all the time but, usually, it is all about how we interpret our circumstances. Our life is what we make of it and how we interpret the events that happen to us. You can take a mistake, failure, or even a painful break-up as a learning experience.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I have hurt, cried bitter tears, and hated through my life. I am the last person to say this will happen overnight. These moments of enjoyment takes the time to see and develop. They are the habits we make through our lives. It takes time to form a negative habit so it will take us a little time to form a positive one. Give yourself a break if you slip and experience and dwell on some negative emotions.

Challenge: Right now, I want you to think about all the things that are wonderful in your life. Think about the love that you share with people in your life. Feel gratefulness for all the achievements in your life no matter how big or small.

You may think: Nothing great has ever happened to me but, I would say to you as your coach, I doubt if that is true. You are looking at all the negatives and not seeing all the great things in your life. Has anyone ever given you a present? Is there food in your home? Do you have a home? If you don’t, has anyone ever smiled at you or shown kindness to you? Did you do anything in school that you were proud of?

Sometimes, it is hard to see the good when all we can see is bad around us. You may have to look hard at first but, after a while, you will begin to see so much to enjoy about your life. Keep looking and you will find it all around!

Please, if you have any questions email me at tinawhite@mymaptosuccess.com

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